Train journeys are fun and interesting. In priyadarshan movies. Only. Period. And in reality, they rank 3rd in the list of crimes against man, number 1 being hitler, stalin, mao and the 2 world wars combined and number 2 being rakhi sawant. Rakhi sawant is god's way of telling man he needs to get his shit right real soon. Anyway, screw rakhi sawant. Train journeys can be a real pain. On a mathematical scale, the amount of distress could be quantified by:
Degree of shitness = [ { time of journey x no. of hours the same destination can be reached by an alternate faster means of transport} + { degree of crapiness of food on a scale of 1 to 10} + { sum of noisy neighboring passengers yapping in a language you do not understand* } + { crazy fucking bhopalis who alternate between shouting "aayi baiyya" and "ore, ravi kishen ki gaana chalayenge hum" every 5 minutes}]
* - irritating kids count.

And all of this shit is happening in 3rd AC. So going my the formula, my journey was at shitness level of 28 x 2.5 + 7 + 15 +2 = 94. If that was my graduation percentage, that would have been happy news. The grand freaking Indian Railway circus! And theres an actual place called "madira" in Andra Pradesh. Wonder what they sell there. Sounds like a holy place from the ring of it. Hope atleast the time I end up spending at chennai is good. That reminds me, when via train, there is a simple heuristics to determine if you have reached home when home sweet home is "singara chennai".: " Feels good. Smells bad. " And to add to it all, my watch strap snapped. Didn't think wrestling with myself in sleep would cause damage to property. What sadness! I feel kind of naked not wearing a watch. I know it sounds weird but screw you.

And as thiruvalluvar said 300 years ago ( give or take 2000, preferably take) :
"Because when I arrive I-I'll bring the fire
Make you come alive I can take you higher
What this is forgot? I must now remind you
Let it rock, let it rock, let it rock".
 If you are wondering where this came from, this was actually written by thiruvalluvar, but mostly all copies were burnt by the secret cult of the "lame guy with dark specs on a wheelchair , chief minister and evil overlord, for all eternity" because this was in english and not the only language the guy on wheelies understood!. good day, people! All hail the revolucion!

** im starting to think i am a dork because I logged in and re-dited this page just because it left out the outermost brackets in the formula up above, cause in the first draft, they didn't confirm to BODMAS rule!!!

Seagulls and afternoons.

Seagulls. Flapping calmly over never ending waves. Through the vastness of the skies above and the sea below, they fly on, so seemingly sure of their path. Instinct, faith; call it what you will, but as long as they reach their destination, nothing matters. Seagulls. I don't remember seeing one up and close. But I like the tone of the word. Strange. Maybe this is what dull weather can do to a person. Its a strange disconnect that fills you when 2.00 pm in the afternoon looks and feels like 8.00 pm in the night. It actually feels much worse, but 8 is a good approximation.

Chichingggg

Too long since I have written anything pointless. Been doing it all through long, but haven't written in a while. No. Read a very good series recently. The gameworld trilogy, the 1st two parts. Good writing in a long while, especially one that didn't throw in the whole Cambridge lingo to appear Indian. I too shall write. I shall call it the KTFC chronicles. Kill The Fool Chronicles. Can't divulge much details coz the talks are going on. With myself. So that's that. And. I love making up sentences that start with a full-stop and end with one. With only a preposition or conjunction in between them. Or a verb. Funny. That one. Or a phrase too. But writing is wonderful. Just when you think there's a lot off stuff going on in your head,you sit to write and realize your head is just a blank vacuum. Hmmm. Anyway. This post needs editing later. Lots of. I think I have made a mark. But something tells me 1/100 doesn't really count. Now that kills all the fun.

15 days.home.fun.frolic.beach.humidity.sweat.At times you get a feeling its just an excuse for a city. Definitely not the best place on the planet. Also not the worst. But there is something of an old world charm in a city that is over 400 years old. And honestly, I haven't got all of it through yet. So I'll just stick to what I felt. I spent half of my schooling here. Memorable times.That's coz I don't remember the other half, was too small a kid then. Chennai ain't a bad city, it has it charms. But when you are someone who used to love the city years ago, its a sad feeling.The city is going nowhere. Freaky traffic, highway roads that are as cramped as one way lanes, people who respond to honking like they are deaf...and love to walk in the very midst of traffic. If I was a first timer, I would hate the city, from the deepest recess of my soul. But something about the city, something great and sweet, hangs on. For starters, you don't need a reason to celebrate here. Everyday, every sunrise, every step, is a celebration in continuum. And the hustle bustle of the city, ridiculous,amazing and weirdly beautiful. Somethings which would irritate you to death at some other place, becomes a matter of everyday passing here. Love it, hate it, the city goes on, a celebration that started 400 years ago still bustling on in all its glory.

I think today I shall write. but before that, there's a whole lot of other very important things to do.brush.bath.pee.poo.pom.(pom: rhymes with pee & poo). So as I was saying, I shall write. or gloat. or maybe float. or eat a goat. I have an obsessive affection for rhymes. Its is getting in my way. I need to get over it. pit. lit.sit.fit.slit. I like grapes. They are the fruits of hope. With an apple or an orange, you are stuck with it if its not good. But with grapes, there are so many of them, there's always a second chance. 90% of the time I investigate a smell, the answers are always bad. The other 10%, its just me hallucinating about the food. I got some pajamas today. With pockets, which is great Before this, I had to hold stuff  when I was sleeping.!! A Frisbee is the only object you can throw at a random person, and it is OK. beautiful invention!!! There are AA batteries, but no B or BB batteries. Maybe it was to avoid people from stuttering, else the conversation would go this way:
man (at a store): can I have BB Batteries.
store guy: yeah. what size?
man: i said BB Batteries.
store guy: I know. W-H-A-T SIZE?!!!!!
and D batteries. that would be tough for the Chinese and Indians. One of my friend stutters. Some think its bad, but I don't think so. Every word he speaks... has suspense.  The problem with having fat friends when I was a kid was, every see-saw was a catapult. I learned ballistics instead of oscillations!!!