I think today I shall write. but before that, there's a whole lot of other very important things to do.brush.bath.pee.poo.pom.(pom: rhymes with pee & poo). So as I was saying, I shall write. or gloat. or maybe float. or eat a goat. I have an obsessive affection for rhymes. Its is getting in my way. I need to get over it. pit. lit.sit.fit.slit. I like grapes. They are the fruits of hope. With an apple or an orange, you are stuck with it if its not good. But with grapes, there are so many of them, there's always a second chance. 90% of the time I investigate a smell, the answers are always bad. The other 10%, its just me hallucinating about the food. I got some pajamas today. With pockets, which is great Before this, I had to hold stuff  when I was sleeping.!! A Frisbee is the only object you can throw at a random person, and it is OK. beautiful invention!!! There are AA batteries, but no B or BB batteries. Maybe it was to avoid people from stuttering, else the conversation would go this way:
man (at a store): can I have BB Batteries.
store guy: yeah. what size?
man: i said BB Batteries.
store guy: I know. W-H-A-T SIZE?!!!!!
and D batteries. that would be tough for the Chinese and Indians. One of my friend stutters. Some think its bad, but I don't think so. Every word he speaks... has suspense.  The problem with having fat friends when I was a kid was, every see-saw was a catapult. I learned ballistics instead of oscillations!!!

Today I made a huge discovery. But I decide to remain silent about it least I give Edison inferiority complex in his grave. I love probability. they have questions like: find the probability that at least one bomb strikes a gupta ? Ans: 1.  Prateek starred in a movie called : R&AC, beer and dhoka. The plot is usual, R &AC exam comes up, prateek says he needs to study for it and 4 days later, he's caught having beer at Geoffrey's. Fat pahadi liar!!!!!(for the geeks, R&AC stands for Rat's Ass Crap..the "&" is just in there to make it look all sophisticated and complex)...The gupta battalion hates me,seems I'm giving them free publicity. What a bunch of morons, they are already 70% of the public!!!!....for baniyas, they do suck at mathematics!!!!!.....I'm a mallu who did half of his schooling in anna-land!!!...life can't get any better near the equator......at times,"what is are you doing" sounds like a legitimate sentence(courtesy my 7th grade maths teacher.....and yes, she had a proper south indian name: samrajyalaxmi!!!!)............and of course, I do have those friends who go "ada paavi!!!" (* tamil for :oh my god, its said that the anna ancients used to say this to scare away humans!!!) at the mention of words like beer, puff, pint, whiskey, sex, girlfriend and life....there's a general feeling that southies are marginalized in N.India...well, if you walk around in lungi(I knew one who went modern and dressed in red shirts,yellow pants and freaky dev anand styled caps....didn't help either), acting like rajnikanth and talking like vijaykanth(nokidding, check this out:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxQt8WDpIpM), accusing people here of giving you weird looks, you shouldn't be surprised. I had a friend with a dark secret in school. Like all "baiys" in my school, excluding the guys in a group who had the title conferred "the rascal fellow" by the principal on each of them(the only resemblance I have with one of those rascals, with the same name as me, is when I stare in the mirror, everything else is fictitious...parallel universes..and mirrors are cheap liars u see,...even the magic mirror cheated the witch queen(sweet monica bellucci)....:-(..!!!) he had a patch of vibuthi ( ash.....all kids were great fans of Lord shiva)...but the truth was.....IT WAS FAIR & LOVELY!!!!!...that rat bastard used it as a back up during the lunch break beautification...and he actually thought it was a million dollar idea and pledged a whole string of "mother promise" and "god promise" when I found it out. ( for the nosy ones , his name was Suresh and the only thing darker than him him was him on a no moon night with no stars.). Yes, it's my semester exam time and yes, I'm bored!!!!

May the force be with you. and with me. and so be all the crap. People are subject to trouble in various sizes and shapes and designations. Weird faculties, old-hag HODs and fat ass lab assistants. Life is determined by a variety of variables, download speeds, manga updates and torrent availability. In college, some people have very good academics...the rest have a life and great friends. The Queen of England is married to the King of England....queer people....if you are already the Queen, marry another country's prince..!!!. Sex is over-rated. So say those who have had it. Hypocritical Bastards!!!. Certain people in college have 100% attendance..by 4th year, they are like the crew on Davy Jone's Dutchman...a part of the scribbled walls, defunct ACs and broken chairs. The pigeons poop on them and nobody notices!!!. Of course there are certain limitations in college life. And of course, they are all fictional. Life Daffy Duck...a flurry of quacky rules. Everybody likes a joke once in a while. All the remaining while, its just the joker at a high probability of skull injury. Its important to look at the bigger picture. Everybody should look at the bigger picture. That way, you get to be irresponsible for the smaller parts and still have a justification for it. Of course, you were looking at the bigger picture!!!. Who invented the word "apple" ? In a lecture, a long restrained need to piss can be a huge driving force :
- it keeps you awake...the only time you look forward to going to the washroom.
- the act is more relieving than a lecture in progress.
- you feel good after a good piss, but feel pissed after a lecture.
Now, a mathematical problem:
A and B live 158 kms apart. A can walk at 3.7 kmph and B can walk at 2.2 kmph...assuming both decide to walk towards each other, find,
- what the hell is wrong with A and B ?
1- both are crazy.
2- you are crazy coz you came up with all that.
3- both 1 and 2
4- I am hungry. I need food.

The duct tape blog started as a blog about the story of the duct-tape and has come to cover various topics, like "staring at white walls to kill boredom", "studying the motion of imaginary flies", "b.tech engg" to "nothing". Everybody loves to dabble in philosophy.Doesn't make a difference if its self made or the highly prevalent "Ctrl+c" and "Ctrl+v" types. Google Buzz is still a no brainer......my brain can't comprehend what it is trying to achieve. Emoticons are over-rated.....they make your fingers do circus stances on the keyboard, and I can't ever seem to remember them. Its equivalent to manually remembering to laugh at a joke than spontaneously laughing at it. It must be taken into consideration that the English language was funny even before the emoticons "lol"ed their way into the language. (of course most of the jokes were English jokes and there were more chances of a partridge pooping on ur head twice in succession than an Englishman understanding their own jokes. Eg.:
englishman 1: I saw thies indean maun with aa twiech on his faace. The faace snotted averytaime he lau-oghed. aet was saw fanny I haed to haold my paaants fram fallin doon.(which translated into meaningful english means:I saw this indian man with a twitch on his face. the face snorted everytime he laughed. it was so funny I had to hold my pants from falling down).
englishman 2: hahahahahaaa. you aere a fanny maun.(19th century "lol"ing. you are a funny man). (yes, they were racists)
GOD(highabove) : what the fuck!!!!! twany pieces of twit poodles!!!!!
the author: end of joke. start "lol" ing or "rofl"ing ur ass off.

men make and un-make themselves, but the cake still needs to be baked and coffee is good anytime of the day!!...........ya, I know, don't ask why!!Its called mechanical engg.