Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Train journeys are fun and interesting. In priyadarshan movies. Only. Period. And in reality, they rank 3rd in the list of crimes against man, number 1 being hitler, stalin, mao and the 2 world wars combined and number 2 being rakhi sawant. Rakhi sawant is god's way of telling man he needs to get his shit right real soon. Anyway, screw rakhi sawant. Train journeys can be a real pain. On a mathematical scale, the amount of distress could be quantified by:
Degree of shitness = [ { time of journey x no. of hours the same destination can be reached by an alternate faster means of transport} + { degree of crapiness of food on a scale of 1 to 10} + { sum of noisy neighboring passengers yapping in a language you do not understand* } + { crazy fucking bhopalis who alternate between shouting "aayi baiyya" and "ore, ravi kishen ki gaana chalayenge hum" every 5 minutes}]
* - irritating kids count.

And all of this shit is happening in 3rd AC. So going my the formula, my journey was at shitness level of 28 x 2.5 + 7 + 15 +2 = 94. If that was my graduation percentage, that would have been happy news. The grand freaking Indian Railway circus! And theres an actual place called "madira" in Andra Pradesh. Wonder what they sell there. Sounds like a holy place from the ring of it. Hope atleast the time I end up spending at chennai is good. That reminds me, when via train, there is a simple heuristics to determine if you have reached home when home sweet home is "singara chennai".: " Feels good. Smells bad. " And to add to it all, my watch strap snapped. Didn't think wrestling with myself in sleep would cause damage to property. What sadness! I feel kind of naked not wearing a watch. I know it sounds weird but screw you.

And as thiruvalluvar said 300 years ago ( give or take 2000, preferably take) :
"Because when I arrive I-I'll bring the fire
Make you come alive I can take you higher
What this is forgot? I must now remind you
Let it rock, let it rock, let it rock".
 If you are wondering where this came from, this was actually written by thiruvalluvar, but mostly all copies were burnt by the secret cult of the "lame guy with dark specs on a wheelchair , chief minister and evil overlord, for all eternity" because this was in english and not the only language the guy on wheelies understood!. good day, people! All hail the revolucion!

** im starting to think i am a dork because I logged in and re-dited this page just because it left out the outermost brackets in the formula up above, cause in the first draft, they didn't confirm to BODMAS rule!!!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Seagulls and afternoons.

Seagulls. Flapping calmly over never ending waves. Through the vastness of the skies above and the sea below, they fly on, so seemingly sure of their path. Instinct, faith; call it what you will, but as long as they reach their destination, nothing matters. Seagulls. I don't remember seeing one up and close. But I like the tone of the word. Strange. Maybe this is what dull weather can do to a person. Its a strange disconnect that fills you when 2.00 pm in the afternoon looks and feels like 8.00 pm in the night. It actually feels much worse, but 8 is a good approximation.

Sunday, November 7, 2010


Too long since I have written anything pointless. Been doing it all through long, but haven't written in a while. No. Read a very good series recently. The gameworld trilogy, the 1st two parts. Good writing in a long while, especially one that didn't throw in the whole Cambridge lingo to appear Indian. I too shall write. I shall call it the KTFC chronicles. Kill The Fool Chronicles. Can't divulge much details coz the talks are going on. With myself. So that's that. And. I love making up sentences that start with a full-stop and end with one. With only a preposition or conjunction in between them. Or a verb. Funny. That one. Or a phrase too. But writing is wonderful. Just when you think there's a lot off stuff going on in your head,you sit to write and realize your head is just a blank vacuum. Hmmm. Anyway. This post needs editing later. Lots of. I think I have made a mark. But something tells me 1/100 doesn't really count. Now that kills all the fun.